Harry & Kay's Story

For Kay and her husband Harry, East Lancashire Hospice’s Hospice at Home service has become much more than care: it’s a lifeline.

Harry, from Accrington, was diagnosed with vascular dementia nearly 16 years ago. As the condition has progressed, life at home has brought increasing challenges. But with the help of the Hospice at Home nurses, his wife, Kay, has found crucial support – both for Harry and herself.

“We’ve used the service for quite a while now,” Kay says. “And honestly, I don’t know what I’d do without them. They are an absolute lifeline.”

As Harry’s primary carer, Kay manages most of his day-today needs, including washing and dressing. But the demands of caring for someone with dementia around the clock can be exhausting. That’s where the Hospice at Home team makes a real difference.

“When the nurses come, I can just have five minutes to myself, even if that’s to do the washing or some ironing, I get a break. Harry calls for me constantly, ‘Where are you? What are you doing? Why aren’t you sitting here with me?’, but when the nurses are here, it gives me time to breathe. Time to get a wash on. Time to rest. Time to sleep. That’s what keeps me going.”

The service the couple receive is mainly during the night; crucial in a household where restful sleep is hard to come by.

“If I go to bed, Harry follows me,” Kay explains. “Even when we try to nap in the afternoon, he’ll often talk through the whole thing. But knowing someone else is there during the night, it gives me peace. It keeps me sane.”

Importantly, it’s not just Kay who benefits from the Hospice at Home service. Harry has developed a rapport with the nurses, which brings him comfort and routine. “He’s really getting used to them now,” Kay says with a smile. “They’re lovely, every one of them.”

Reflecting on the value of the service, Kay is clear: “East Lancashire Hospice is more than what people think. They help in ways you don’t always expect. That one visit makes such a huge difference.”

“As a community, we need to support the hospice – they need it,” shares Kay. “And because every donation helps to bring care home, families like ours; we wouldn’t manage without them.”

For Kay and Harry, and countless other families across Blackburn, Darwen, Hyndburn and the Ribble Valley, East Lancashire Hospice is a vital lifeline, providing so much more than compassionate care.

With your donation, you can help to ‘Bring Care Home’.